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Q: What does a proud old computer call his new little son? 
       A: A microchip off the old block. 


Artificial intelligence usually beats real stupidity.

Q: How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? 
A: None. It's a hardware problem. 


If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0 

Q: What is another name for a computer virus? 
A: A terminal illness 


Mac users swear by their Mac, PC users swear at their PC. 

Q: What do you get if you take your computer to an ice rink? 
A: A slipped disk 

Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with your Microsoft product. 


   Q: How can you tell if a computer geek is an extrovert? 
    A: They stare at your shoes when you talk instead of their own. 

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes. 


Q: Why did the programmer use the entire bottle of shampoo during one shower? 
A: Because the bottle said "Lather, Rinse, Repeat." 

Q: Why can't cats work on the computer? 
A: They get too distracted chasing the mouse around. 

Windows Vista supports real multitasking - it can boot and crash simultaneously. 


"In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows? "

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. 

If you think patience is a virtue, try surfing the net on a 14.4k dial up connection. 

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

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